The Alternate Universe Transcript
Scene 1 Calvin is seen walking home from school. Calvin: Uh-oh, Hobbes is gonna pounce on me when I come in the door! I better make up a plan... (short pause) I know! I'll get Dad's ladder from the garage and climb to the window in my room, and then grab my transmogrifier gun! That'll show 'em! Calvin does his plan, but when he gets up to his transmogrifier gun, the duplicator starts shaking, and suddenly, a blue Calvin and a blue Hobbes appear named Nivlac and Sebboh. Then, Hobbes and Andy come up and Hobbes pounces on Calvin. Hobbes: There's your daily pounce! Calvin: Oh, hush up. Andy: What's going on here? Calvin: These dupes automatically came out of my duplicator and I don't know why. Hobbes: Yes, but they're blue. Andy: Ya know, it's rude to act like people are not even there. And can I try the duplicator? Calvin: Well, okay. Andy duplicates himself three times. Andys: COOL! Nivlac: ?tahW Sebboh: .egaugnal ruo dnatsrednu t'nod tsuj yeht ebyaM Andy 2: They don't seem to speak English. Andy 1: You're right, Andy. Andy 3: I totally agree. What about the others? Calvin: I think I know what language they're speaking. Andys and Hobbes: WHAT? Calvin: Hsilgne. Hobbes: I've never heard of that one. Tell me more. Calvin: It's English backwards. (short pause) Hobbes: Oh, groan.... Andy 2: Wait, if they're blue... Andy 1: You're rude! Andy 3: And if they speak 'Hsilgne'... Andy 1: They might be from the alternate dimension? Andys 2 and 3: Exactly. Calvin: Then we'll teach 'em thier language! Andy 1: EVERYONE HERE IS RUDE! Andy 3: Wait, but that'll take a long time! It would take days! MONTHS! YEARS! DECADES! CENTURIES!!!! Calvin: Yes, but all we have to do is show them that you need to just say Hsilgne backwards. Andy 1: RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUD! Andy 2: YOU'RE BEGINNING TO BE RUDE! Andy 3: Oh, I see. Let's do it! (montage) Scene 2 Calvin: Well, it's time for for final test, Nivlac and Sebboh. Nivlac: Bring it on! Sebboh: Yeah! Andy 2: I bet no one has learned English this quick! Andy 3: SHHHHHH! Calvin gives Nivlac and Sebboh each a piece of paper. Calvin: Read this. Nivlac and Sebboh: "Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers." Everyone: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! Mrs. Johnson: CALVIN! TIME FOR DINNER! Calvin: Okay, Mom! Nivlac: What do we do? Calvin: I'll duplicate myself. Then, force the dupe to give him his shirt! Sebboh: What about me? Calvin: Uhhh... HIDE! Sebboh: Oh, that's just GREAT. Calvin duplicates himself, then runs off. Nivlac: Ummm... Gimme your shirt and i'll give ya five bucks. Dupe: Alright. Nivlac(thinking): Uh-oh.. i don't HAVE five bucks! Scene 3 Calvin: I'm back! Nivlac(whispering): Oh, good. I bribed him for five bucks, and I don't have any. What do I do?! Calvin: Go to Elliot's place. You'll know where his house is. Nivlac: Um, OK... c'mon Dupe, i've got something even better! Dupe: Better than five bucks?! What's better than that?!?! Nivlac spies a house with a plague that says "Eliott and Socrates' House". Nivlac knocks on the door and Socrates answers. Socrates: What do you want?! Dupe jumps in the house and tries to steal some money, and Nivlac slams the door. When Nivlac gets back, he sees Calvin in his pyjamas. Calvin: I have to go to bed. Nivlac: Oh. Andy 1: We should probably go now, right? Calvin: Yes. Nivlac: What about me and Sebboh? Sebboh: Yeah! Calvin: You can sleep in my bed. Nivlac: Yay! Scene 4 Calvin wakes up. Calvin: Boy, that was a good sleep, huh guys- Calvin notices that Nivlac and Sebboh are gone. Calvin: OH NO! They must've had a time paradox! Suddenly, Dupe appears. Dupe: THAT WAS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE! Can I have my shirt back now? Calvin: *sigh* Alright, let me print another dupe... THE END Epilogue (Scene 5) Elliot: Ugh, those stupid psycho hobos! Socrates: I've never seen seen one of those before. Suddenly, Nivlac and Sebboh appear right on thier doorstep along with an army of Dupes. Nivlac: Hahahahaha... Screen turns black suddenly, and credits roll. Category:Season 3 transcripts